Wednesday, 31 March 2010

Watch out for the Easter Eggs

This is my first blog post in a first time. I am a lazy blogger.
Not that i do not want to to blog. I just do not take the time to do it.

Plenty of things have happened in Iceland since my last post…in September 2009. The important thing that you have to know is that he Kreppa (Crisis) monster is still rambling the streets of Reykjavík leaving behind itself load of "victims".

I want to talk about food in Iceland and particularly Easter.

Food in Iceland is crap. This is simple clear and the naked truth. The food for sell in stores is bad quality and you have to search really for good products. By good I mean not rotten, not out of date and with production origin information. I am highly suspicious of stickers on some jars saying "cherries from somewhere". I don't know why. This is not appealing to me.

Easter time is interesting in Iceland because I think that Easter eggs are representing everything that wrong with food in Iceland.

Back in France, Easter happens the following way: You go to bed and when you wake up, you discover that the bells that came directly from Rome, have put in your own tree in your garden (or your very own ficus in your apartment's living room) candies and small gifts. In most of the case, you have to climb the tree to get the candies. The bells coming to my home were very much adept of the top of the tree and I had to take a lot of risk. Don't know why.

I can still see myself in pyjama's jumping around my tree trying to get the candies, climbing the branches, risking my life just in order to get candies.

It has it pros and cons. In one hand, you freeze your ass and there is a great chance that you will injure yourself at some point by falling from the tree or breaking a branch, but on the other hand you get some exercise and you feel you really deserve candies.

Here in Iceland, no such things. In most cases You get one egg, just one "chocolate" egg. Some very people get lucky and get several. No need to hunt then outside or climb trees. What does matter in Iceland is the size of the eggs. Yes, in this case (like in most of the cases) size does matter. It starts at number 2, which is according to some is really humiliating. Size 10 is the biggest… I have heard some stories about a size 14…but I think this is a urban myth.

When it comes to candy and especially Easter eggs, Icelanders are size queens. They like it big. The bigger the better. Personally would say…the bigger the sooner type II diabetic… but that just my personal opinion. Those eggs are not good. They are just full of sugar. I bet there is less than 2% of chocolate and the rest is just msg and other crappy stuff. My issue with Easter eggs in Iceland is that they are really bad. They taste bad, they are bad quality chocolate. They cost a lot and looking at the ingredients list raises some serious question. I have already warned my favourite person that I will not accept typical Icelandic Easter Eggs. I pointed out to him a bakery where they sell real eggs made of real chocolate. He knows what to do.

Yet Icelanders take their Easter eggs very seriously. I recently read in the news "some tragic stories"of Icelanders sending Easter eggs abroad to relatives (to Denmark mainly). The eggs got broken on the way and the people who send it were quite dramatic about it. They accused the custom and the post office in Denmark of badly handling their precious eggs.

I think this is ridiculous. First who would send such eggs to someone? They are not good and this is just cruel. I would send those to my worst enemy. What I think is more cruel, is that sending it to Denmark where I am sure they have plenty of good chocolate appointed by her Magesty the Queen. Grandparents were outraged by the fact that their grandchildren received broken eggs. Few years ago I would have felt bad for them. Now that every package that has been send to me here in Iceland have been opened and checked, that chocolate have been taken away for some stupid reason…(a.k.a the custom workers wanted some) I do not feel bad for these people. (yeah, I know I have no heart and I am being mean). This is justified bad karma. In any case the chocolate will still be eaten…

In any case, I wish all a happy Easter and may you not receive one of these awful Icelandic Easter eggs and if someone gives you one…well good luck



Yessica said...

I just mindlessly consumed my whole size #3 paskaegg while reading one of my exciting textbooks. I should probably go purge now.

Virgile said...

well i think you should go the slutty cat way.... eat grass and then find a shoe or other valuables object...